A Bookmark.

There is no resolution here. This is not an after-thought or educational click-bait. I am directly in the middle of it, and I wanted to make note of it now. As a reminder maybe. As a bookmark.

Change is an odd and unexpected thing. There are many stories written about the blossoming of the true person, but I don’t know many that suit me, that tell of a garden inside a person. Shifting many seasons; planting many seeds.

And like the current fall, change is the often met with loss. What becomes tricky, as a man in his new 30s, is how to decide: which leaves must burn away for the season to shift?

I’m speaking a bit poetic, but, again, it’s because I have no answers. I’m in the middle.

Urban Adventures #1

I left the bus-and-truck lifestyle of performing 2 years ago, hungry for stability and "Friday Nights." It didn't take long for my legs to grow restless, and took a better part of a year before I learned how to soak up the weekend. New York can be a deceptive city if you're looking for an inexpensive adventure. But, with 40 hours at a desk you too can learn: Adventure. Is. Out. There.

A simple guide for a simple escape.

1. Find a Town that Sounds Kinda Familiar?

Just 24 miles from my apartment in Harlem is a little town named "Sleepy Hollow" - which has... The Headless Horseman, and, well, that's as far as I got.  All I knew is that Harlem does not, and I should go. Every city has its Sleepy Hollow, and even if you don't, throw a dart at your computer and go with it.

2. Fantasize About The Beer

By the 945th email on Wednesday, it's time to dive into the deep end of your fantasy. Soon you'll raise a glass with a bar full of headless men: Adventure. Is. Out. There.

3. Wake Up Very Early

I don't think you can call it an adventure if you've slept in. I didn't make this rule, but I believe in it. BONUS: The earlier you leave, the more breaks you can take.

4. Hop on your bike - head north.

Heading out of Manhattan can be a moderate pain. I'll say though, when cars aren't double parked and the rush hour commuters aren't bopping about, New York City has some excellent bike paths. And, at 6am, the city is quiet and the roads are free.

As soon as you reach Van Cortland Park in the Bronx, the bike path expands into the most incredible urban trail I've ever been on: South/North County Trailway. It seems to span 30-40 miles north of Manhattan, sprinkled with a variety of views and smooth - possibly very new? - cement. 

5. Drink a Beer

This should be the next step, but because of Step 3, you might land at little early. I arrived in Sleepy Hollow at 10am and apparently, bars in the Westchester do not open this early (not sure why...?) Thankfully, taking in the smells of a small town so quickly after leaving Harlem was intoxicating enough.

Tarrytown, New York.

5. Chug a Beer

Surprisingly, Sleepy Hollow was a bit uneventful. There's a statue of the headless horsemen somewhere, but I truly could not find it. Thankfully, Tarrytown is an easy 5 minute walk from downtown Sleepy Hollow, and it delivered on all the small town charm this suburban kid (I'm 30) could ask for, including a very talkative stranger and a Farmer's Market with a live folk band. 

And finally, the bars have opened! Chug away!

Sweet Grass Grill

5. Take Your Time

The best part of any bike tour is the freedom of travel. You may feel anxious getting to a destination, but the stroll home can and should be a leisurely one. I packed this hammock from amazon, and set up shop in the trees somewhere between Tarrytown and Harlem. Nothing takes the city out of your sights like swinging between two trees. And it was only 26 bucks!

6. Dream Up The Next One

Thankfully, Saturdays happen every week. Go find yours.

The Weekend Warrior

I've lived in New York a lot longer than I ever planned to. Really... I never planned it. Growing up in the suburbs of Chicago, this city was a fantasy.

Don't get me wrong -- I was addicted to New York. When I was 8, I obsessed over Ellis Island creating (and sleeping with) a Harry Houdini doll made of a recycled Coke bottle. My first password was "JonathanLarson!" I stole a Party Monster DVD from the library and fantasized about doing lines of cocaine as a pimpled troll (don't worry I'm clean). I've read four biographies of Frank Sinatra's Jersey youth and by my final years of high school, I was doodling like Keith Haring. 

But, to me, New York was fiction. 

As the story goes, now that I'm in New York, I have a found nostalgia for Midwest life. The long and short of it is: a queer kid needs New York. As religion needs its mecca, queer people need theirs. New York was mine, and even now I'm grateful for her. 

Thankfully, I've grown up, found comfort in my skin, and have been given the gift to ask myself: What else are you? Once you've planted your flag, what's next?

This blog is my attempt to have my New York and my midwest too. I'm 30, you know? Let's get after it.